• Unconditional Love and Boundaries

    Unconditional Love and Boundaries

    A reflection on Cloud & Townsend’s “Boundaries with Kids” In Christian terms, unconditional love is love that doesn’t depend on the attitudes or actions of the beloved. It is a self-sacrificing love, which finds its ultimate expression in Christ’s sacrifice on the cross: “But God shows his love for us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8, RSV). Yet we know that God did not love us just to leave us wallowing in our sin; on the contrary, we are told, “Do you not know that God’s love is meant to lead you to repentance?” (Romans 2:4, RSV). We all desire love from our parents, children,…

  • 15 MORE Books Recommended By Counselors

    15 MORE Books Recommended by Agape Counselors

    As promised last month, here is another list of books that our counselors recommend. There are many books out there that our counselors recommend to clients regularly. Below are 15 of the books that are on the list. Click on the pictures to view these books on Amazon.com Book Store.   How We Love by Milan & Kay Yerkovich This book, based on attachment theory, helps people understand how childhood experiences have shaped the way they approach adult relationships. It has a lot of examples to clarify points as well as a workbook to help people change what they want to change in themselves and their relationships. Recommend for couples.   Personality Plus…

  • Do Your Relationships Measure Up as Healthy or Toxic?

    Do Your Relationships Measure Up As Healthy or Toxic?

    By JuJuane Easter-Hutchins, MA, LPC Have you ever found yourself wondering if a friend, familial, romantic and/or business relationship is one that is healthy for you?  Are you involved in a relationship that leaves you feeling drained and overwhelmed?  Is your relationship toxic? And if so, how would you know? The Bible has been referred to as Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.  This God-inspired book provides us with the knowledge needed to live a life pleasing to our Lord.  The Bible is all-inclusive and supplies truth to guide our thoughts, behaviors and actions as we seek to glorify God here on Earth.  The Bible teaches us how to exist; we…

  • Helicopter Mode: Who's It For... Really?

    Helicopter Mode: Who’s It For… Really?

    When we love and are committed to our family members, we want to ensure their success and happiness. It’s natural at times, however, that we may feel responsible, or be made to feel responsible, for the failures or unhappiness of those we love. This can include both our children and our spouse. Feelings of responsibility for another person’s emotions and behaviors can drive us into guilt, which may challenge our own personal boundaries. Before you know it, we might be climbing into the rescue helicopter and dialing the automatic pilot to the “No Boundaries Mode” so that we are always emotionally available to the other person. Now don’t get me wrong. Being emotionally available is a…